the deepest in heart

i'm gonna cry, when i read these

something intrinsic lost...and forget...

what have i been thinking of?
what had i insisted?

(i was looking up my jan-mar'08 post)

One Life

I should change my life.

Being my dad daughter, Being a good person, Being a human.
Life is just once, i got to remember!
This is about me. No regret.

an impulse

this is cool.

i google *momalim*, as the nickname i used in twitter & tripadvisor, my previous post in tripadvisor are shown in results by different languages of tripadvisor web, included japanese. and my twitter home page also.

soon after, i register a same name to my couch surfing account ;) glad that, i found a hoster in Vientiane. I'm going to join this powerful interaction of travelers?! hah, this is really exciting!

i will look forward to my upcoming trip =)
shouted for LAOS!


P.S.
I hate of this excitement, in this moment!
b'cuz i gotta stay focused on my books now!!

IQ所剩不多的*认真*

话说昨天凌晨，我偷懒。发现PPS新大陆。PPS居然有我爱看的“世界那么大”2010版；假假开着study guide在算一直算不到的IRR，然后一口气的看完墨西哥、突尼西亚、costa rica、越南和香港的，直到早上，我依然算不到IRR。

大家都懂，我是个搞不清楚的人。外表斯文，嘴里粗俗；喜欢看书，却没有气质；课业麻麻地，古歌searching还不错；喜欢skydive/潜水，却怕高又怕水；兰有知识喜欢看history channel和travel & living，什么外星人探索、mars的研究、神秘的埃及/Jerusalem/Petra/Mayan，我都爱看。是不是觉得意想不到？！我就是个捉摸不清的女生，我也搞不清楚状况。

离题了 = ='

事实是我想说，在“世界那么大”澳洲打工留学的那一集，一个65岁的澳婆婆，樱文（我最喜欢的主持人）在澳的寄宿妈妈说，人要学会enjoy life，才会获得开心。我就想说有多少时候，我们都忘了要认真对待、享受、喜欢自己的生活；张开眼睛的每一天，围绕着大家心中的是什么？“又是一天”。

无可否认在背包的时候你尝尽新鲜事，每天看到的、得到的都不一样，你会不知觉的觉得世界真美好，心灵升华。好奇心驱使下，你感受生活，你享受，每一天都好幸福。不禁想想，原来那个时候的你在认真活着，现在的你忽略了认真获得的快乐。得过且过或许是世上最简单的生活，可是却不是最理想的自己。

玛雅族预测2012年12月是Earth更换新面貌的周期，如果世界只剩下845天....对于一个容易迷失，容易醒觉，又容易遗忘的人类.....我活着的时间是什么？

*****

PS.
我真的猜不透，我真的没有办法好好叙述我的思维。想的和说出来的总是有偏差；打华文的时候想到英文，打英文的时候却又翻译by华文。我无法不承认我是个怪女生，神经线错乱交差，搞得无法有有条不紊的思维。难道fb说的-半夜睡觉会让人变笨-是真的？？怪不得financial system的历史我读到这么辛苦 = =' 或许我的IQ已所剩无几了......

Dépression.

IF mama calls me right now
i would ask her
what do you think if i'm not studying anymore

i know the answer

she will scold me
even she always ask me not to study so hard
even she thinks i'm too early to prepare my exam
even she loves me

she hang off the phone

and one hour later
my hand phone is ringing
is mum again
she must be very worrying
she comforts me
she asks me
until she can't stand for her tears

this must be a long day ever for her

the next day
*heartless* is ring out all around my room
daddy is on the phone
he says, I'm disappointed
then, you could tell daddy anything
...tears chocked my words

the price/consequence is unimaginable

**********

$hapo tells me, God is fair
i shouldn't depressed
even i would have nothing one day

God won't lay me down
i'll just have to believe it and see it

Dieu me bénisse =)

fou!

I must be mad.

since the day they told me they changed their mind
i was crazily surfing net for good prices
and found Abdul Chalet's comments @tripadvisor.com
i'm not supposed to do this during this cruciall time

AND
i was wondering my availability of writing the same things...
giving a reason myself to practice my writing
i wrote this
the first time i post sth serious on guai lou web, wow!

**********

i miss my français class
it's coming school on next month
but head drop heavy+heavy+heavy

when weekend class comes to weekdays classes
it is an intensive way
10weeks duration now become 5weeks
every one and a half months have to pay
IM BROKE, order me a skyjuice every time yamcha
though my Mauritian Celio will change to a pure French guys
how we wish to be taught by french =)
however, my opportunity cost is relatively high
and i got to get back home at 9pm every two days in week
during my exam period
my god~~~~

Je dois être folle.

broken english in my live

33days to go
i just realized i have finish an academic year
the next will be start on September
how surprise it is
i got more than five months holiday
included thirty three days for exam preparation
and three days examination

*time is driving fast when you're feeling it's short*

sometimes i just lost of it
i have forgotten the most important things in my life
when you wake up
you lost your time and your mind
and maybe next time you are not only lose these

*I'm just keep running in a circle*

i knew that
i'm different with all of my friends
not because i'm special
thing is, there is something important awaiting me
i shouldn't put it behind
but i did it always :(

*i'm not a good person*


p.s. i love you, daddy and mummy.